Out Of My Comfort Zone: Thoughts on Moving Overseas
Leaving my comfort zone
I have less than a month until I will have left my job, moved out of my house, moved in with my parents and packed my life up to shift to the other side of the world. EEEEK. Until this weekend, all I had done was make a huge pile of clothes that I don't want and cleaned up my old bedroom at my parents to make room for storing stuff. Packing queen right here ;D
So, how do I feel about leaving my secure little bubble indefinitely? It feels totally surreal. The flights are booked, which means it’s happening, but at the same time it feels like it's someone else leaving. Like, maybe I will wake up and it's just part of a dream. So far I haven't woken up, and the flights are still booked. And the packing has to begin for real this weekend! The first little shock of the situation so far has been coming home to a house with no pictures on it and having to put my beautiful cat up for adoption. My brain has been reeling ever since.
This is my first ever time that I will be unemployed, although I prefer my nana’s title, ‘between jobs’ and my favorite - ‘freelancer’. It’s a strange feeling to think I will be living off whatever’s in my bank account until someone will hire me! It’s scary, but also really exciting because it means all of the doors of possibility are open - who knows what I will be doing! Plus, I can use this new free time to boost my other skills - do more online learning on Skillshare, work on the blog, write more magazine articles and practice my photography. Woohoo!
As for leaving the bubble of my family and friends? I’m not quite sure how I’m going to deal with being in a new city only knowing my boyfriend, his family and the few friends of his I know. But, being a reasonably confident person I’m sure meeting new people will be less scary than getting to England successfully seems to be! I also plan on skating and playing derby with different leagues in the UK so I will meet new peeps through that too. Not seeing my mum and grandparents every week, helping my dad on his farm, snuggling my cat… These are the things I’m going to miss. Thank god for Skype at least.
It's kind of terrifying
I obviously have a lot of what-ifs and negative thoughts as well as the usual pre-traveling excitement - I know that they are a bit of a package deal with major decisions. So what am I worried about?
I'm worried that people were right, and I'm going to be so incapable of travelling by myself that I end up on the wrong plane or missing a flight because I'm late all the time. (I've signed up for Tripcase so I won't get on the wrong flight or get the wrong time!).
I'm worried that people were right that I'm really naïve and too friendly and someone will take advantage of me for it. I'm not street smart, sure. I grew up in the country where no one wanted to hurt me or take something of mine, but I'm hoping I can get by on intuition and learning quickly!
I'm worried whether I'm totally mad for leaving a safe and secure job with great bosses and colleagues. Half the time I can't wait to be doing something different, and then the other half I'm telling myself I'm crazy for leaving when there are dozens of girls who would be so grateful for my job. (I know that in reality, I would regret not going if I stayed out of complacency and fear. There's always more jobs to be had!).
I'm scared that being able to live my life how I want (nomadically, by freelancing etc) is just bullcrud and too hard so I may as well just get used to working a job I don't love for mediocre money. (As I don't actually know any freelancers, all I'm going off here is what I've read from others online and in magazines. The pretty picture painted for the people stuck in a 9 to 5.... But, I refuse to believe it's impossible. I will make it happen!).
I'm afraid that I'm going to end up broke, stranded and asking my parents for help. This one... Well, I've made some bad decisions to end up here. I am going to do my darndest to avoid this at all costs!
Fear. Indecision. Doubt. Repeat. Add in simultaneous flashes of panic that I'm not organised yet, but can't wait to go means I barely know how I'm feeling most of the time. But the hundreds of people I've spoken too can't be wrong - it will be a life changing experience. It won't be constant macaron-under-the-Eiffell-tower moments throughout our travels, but I feel incredibly lucky and grateful for the opportunity to see new places and tick off some of our bucket list.
As for my worries? Most of them are small fish stuff that I hope will be blown out in the first few months (like sucking at traveling). Whatever happens, happens. I'm sure I'm big enough and scary enough to deal with it! There are so many badass bloggers (and travel writers, photographers and more) out there who have paved the way for newbies like myself, who can vouch for a life on the road. Especially badass lady bloggers - who says travelling is hard? Or dangerous? Or solo female travel shouldn't be done? Not these chicks. They're out there doing it, inspiring people like myself to just get on a plane and just start. I'm sure there will be mishaps and tantrums along the way (most likely caused by lack of snacks, if I know myself) but having a few worries make me miss out on the incredible chance of experiencing life in other cultures would be mental. I hope one day a few of you are inspired to see more of the world after seeing some of our upcoming adventures on this blog!
11 more days at work. 4 and a half weeks left with my family. A month until I'm on a plane, leaving safe little New Zealand indefinitely! And where do the adventures begin? A week in Burleigh Heads in the Gold Coast of Australia, soaking up the sun and totally blissing out. Then the Christmas Markets in Munich with friends.... From there you will have to stay tuned to the blog to find out!